After learning that Mad Max is heading back to the big screen after a 25-year absence in “Mad Max: Fury Road,” my first thought was, naturally, “who was going to play the post-apocalyptic Aussie?” (Tom Hardy, a brilliant British actor.) My second thought? “I wonder if they are going to give him another canine sidekick?” To me, these things are important. In “Mad Max: Road Warrior,” the kerchief wearing blue heeler was as memorable to me as was a leather-clad Mel Gibson and the film’s motorcycle riding, Mohawk-sporting villain.  (This film was pro-S&M before the Wachowskis even dreamed up “The Matrix.”)

Considering the fact that 77.5 million people in the United States own a dog, it isn’t surprising that, although they aren’t always the main characters, canines turn up quite a bit in feature films, on TV and in animation. Because of my own love for the four-legged creatures, I tend to make a mental note whenever I see one on the big or small screen. Some directors, especially Tim Burton and Mamoru Oshii, are such dog lovers themselves – Burton is partial to chihuahuas/Oshii to basset hounds – you can guarantee that their films will have canine cameos. Take Burton, for instance, his first feature, “Frankenweenie” (1984) is about Sparky, a bull terrier, who, after being hit by a car, is brought back to life. In “Beetlejuice” (1988) a Jack Russell terrier is responsible for the deaths of Adam and Barbara Maitland (Alec Baldwin and Geena Davis). He is walking in front of a bridge, and they swerve to avoid hitting him. In “Edward Scissorhands” (1990), the titular character discovers that he has a gift for dog grooming, which leads him to hair styling. In one particularly touching scene, the dejected character is sitting on the curb, when a shaggy dog runs out from behind a house and sits next him. Instinctively, he uses his fingers to trim the hair from the dog’s eyes. The dog licks Edward and runs away. More dogs in Burton’s films will be discussed below. But first, perhaps the most memorable moment in a Burton film occurs in “Mars Attacks” (1996), in which the invading aliens graft Sarah Jessica Parker’s head onto the body of a Chihuahua; and the dog’s head onto her torso.

To find an anti-dog loving director consider the case of Stephen Spielberg: In at least two of his films – “Jurassic Park: The Lost World” and “Jaws” – he has included a dog just so it can be a victim of the monster. In the former, it’s a sight gag. A dog house hangs from a T-Rex’s mouth by the chain that was once attached to the canine. To his credit, I guess, in “E.T: The Extra-Terrestrial” (1982), at least the family dog doesn’t get vaporized by the visiting alien. It only gets its cast-offs out of the refrigerator.

In homage to movies with a canine costar, I have compiled a huge list – that’s 50 big ones – of some of my favorites. So many of these take me back to my childhood.

1)      “Mad Max: Road Warrior”(1981) – As Max races down the desolate highway in his V-8 Interceptor, sitting in the seat next to him is his dog, named simply Dog.  According to IMDB, the producers found the Australian cattle dog or blue heeler at a local shelter, where “he was scheduled to be euthanized the next day.” The animal trainer for the film found the animal to be very trainable – of the 80 breeds on the Intelligence of Dogs list, this one comes in at No. 10. Once filming wrapped, it found a home on a ranch.

2)      “I Am Legend” (2007) – This is definitely not my favorite film. Not only because I dislike Will Smith, who plays Robert Neville, the last “human” survivor of a horrible plague, but also because his faithful companion doesn’t make it to the end (many tears were shed). What landed this film on my list is that the German Shepherd is a truly gorgeous animal, and the bond created between her and Smith was utterly believable. According to IMDB, “Will Smith grew so enamored of his canine co-star, Abby, that he tried to adopt her when the shooting was finished, but the dog’s trainer could not be persuaded to give her up.” I don’t doubt it.

3)      “Lost” (2004-2010) – Ah, Vincent (in real life named Madison), Walt’s Golden Labrador Retriever, you made watching this already addictive TV series even more watchable.        Glad to see him back at the end.

4)      “The Simpsons” (1989-present) – Santa’s Little Helper, a greyhound, has been on this popular animated TV series since the episode “Simpsons Roasting on an Open Fire.” He’s been through obedience school, nearly died of gastric torsion, was abandoned, briefly, for another more intelligent breed, and even was enlisted as a police dog. Didn’t SLH even live with Mr. Burns for awhile?

5)      “The Hills Have Eyes” (2006) – In this horror film remake, a vacationing family finds itself under attack by another family; one of cannibalistic mutants. The film starts out with two German Shepherds – Beauty and Beast – and sadly only Beast makes it out alive, and boy is he pissed off. He helps Doug, the bespectacled yuppie turned bona fide mutant killer, to kick some serious ass.

6)      “Bowfinger” (1999) – I don’t really remember much about this Steve Martin-Eddie Murphy comedy except for the dog. Named Betsy (played by Mindy), it, at one point, wears a pair of red high heels and walks across the floor. I have a larger-than-life standup of Betsy in my closet.

7)      “Frasier” (1993-2004) – I enjoyed the witty repartee between brothers Niles and Frasier, but even more, I liked the frequent antics of Eddie (played by Moose), Martin Crane’s Jack Russell. According to IMDB, he received more fan mail than anyone else on the show. He died in 2006, at 15 ½ years old.

8)      “The Mask” (1994) – It’s difficult to steal scenes from Jim Carrey, but Max (Milo) did it, especially when this Jack Russell put on the mask and went positively ballistic. Watching some clips on YouTube makes me want to watch this film all over again.

9)      “Underdog” (2007) – I was reluctant to see this film, which was based on a popular cartoon series from the 1960s, which was, in turn, created by General Mills to promote its products, but it was hilarious. The caped crusader was played by a beagle and given its voice by Jason Lee.

10)   “The Jerk” (1979) – When a golden colored mutt barks at Navin Johnson’s (Steve Martin) motel door, he thinks there’s a fire. So he runs around, waking up all of the other guests. It’s a false alarm, and “Lifesaver’s” name is quickly changed to “Shithead.”

11)   “Benji” (1974) – I’m pretty sure that Joe Camp is to blame for my obsession with dogs. I saw this movie when I was really, really young and fell in absolute love with this intelligent, shaggy, brown-colored little scamp, who in real life was named Higgins. A shelter rescue, Benji was one of a kind. According to imdb, this film was a guilty pleasure of Alfred Hitchcock. I’ve always loved Hitch; now I think I love him even more.

12)   “Pee Wee’s Big Adventure” (1985) – Pee Wee Herman’s diminutive pooch Speck is a white and black spotted Chihuahua that seems to be able to communicate with his owner. When he isn’t barking, he lives in a giant dog house in his owner’s bedroom.

13)   “Wallace and Gromit in a Close Shave” (1995) – It’s difficult to pick my favorite Wallace and Gromit film/short, but this one has to be the front-runner, because of Shawn the Sheep. Aside from that, Gromit, who is fashioned out of clay, is an intelligent, put-upon beige colored dog who never says a word. He doesn’t have to; his facial expressions speak 1,000 words.

14)   “As Good as It Gets” (1997) – Verdell, an “it’s so ugly I have to have one” Brussels griffon, owned, in the film by Jack Nicholson’s homosexual neighbor, teaches Nicholson’s curmudgeonly character a thing or two about love and compassion.

15)   “Family Guy” (1999- present) – Brian (voiced by Seth MacFarlane) is the smartest “person” living in the Griffin household. He’s well read, drinks coffee, dates human women, and is best when paired with the equally out of place Stewie (also voiced by Seth MacFarlane). When these two go on the road, it’s just like Bing and Crosby all over again. Best yet … Brian has a singing voice that’s pretty close to perfect; sort of Sinatra-esque.

16)   “Cowboy Bebop” (1998) – Ein, a Pembroke Welsh corgi, exhibits great intelligence, primarily because it was greatly enhanced by a research facility. The dog was a regular presence on this popular anime.

17)   “How the Grinch Stole Christmas” (1966) – The Grinch’s long-suffering assistant, Max, is pure innocence. I remember feeling absolutely gutted as I watched the poor brown mutt, wearing his heavy reindeer horn and struggling to pull that oversized sleigh. Grinch, you are a mean one.

18)   “Fraggle Rock” (1983) – One of Jim Henson’s several canine characters, Sprocket, was a shaggy grayish/brownish, very expressive puppet who lived with the not-so-bright Doc. All Sprocket wanted to do was catch himself a Fraggle.

19)   “Labyrinth” (1986) – Sir Didymus, a fox-terrier who believes he is a great and chivalrous knight and who rides on a canine steed named Ambrosius. Thankfully Sir Didymus has no sense of smell, otherwise he couldn’t bear to guard the bridge leading over the Bog of Eternal Stench.

20)   “Dark Crystal” (1982) – I’m not sure what Fizzgig was, but I always thought he was an odd Gelfling canine. So there. I thought he rocked with his gigantic mouth and tons of crazy brown fur. Henson obviously liked dogs, and I loved Henson. I was truly devastated when I learned of his death in 1990. The world has never been the same.

21)   “Full Metal Alchemist” (2003-2004) – The fix-it-up girl, Winry, has an adorable black dog named Den that has an automail leg. I don’t think it’s ever explained why.

22)   “Beverly Hills Chihuahua” (2008) – Sure, everyone loves the spoiled rotten Pomeranian named Chloe (voiced by Drew Barrymore), but I’m partial to Delgado, the gruff German shepherd that is voiced by Andy Garcia. I used to have a super crush on Garcia; haven’t met a German shepherd I haven’t liked.

23)   “The Brady Bunch” (1969-1974) – Another lovable, shaggy mutt from my youth. This one was named Tiger. According to one site, and it breaks my heart to report this, “the (real-life) dog was run over by a car and died of his injuries before the fourth episode. Producers were able to find a look-alike … but (it) didn’t last too long. He was let go because of his alleged unpredictability.” Tiger was written out of the show! Bastards. I still remember the episode during which Tiger runs away and Bobby is heartbroken. Way to go producers!

24)   “Babe” (1995) – I really, really love Babe, the pig with a gigantic heart, but the border collies Rex and Fly are also pretty awesome. Even though he’s gruff, you still feel sorry for Rex, because he is too proud to admit that he’s not the dog he once was. It doesn’t hurt that one of my favorite actors, Hugo Weaving, lends his voice to the canine. (I get the feeling that George Miller, who wrote the screenplay for this film and who wrote/directed “Road Warrior” is a bit of a dog fan, himself.)

25)   “Scooby Doo, Where are You?” (1969-72) – I must admit that I never missed this show when I was a child. I must have watched it in syndication, though, because I’m not that bloody old. Loved this crime fighting, scaredy cat’s interaction with that groovy dude Shaggy. These two were always hungry. Hmmm. Was some weed being toked in that Mystery Machine? What was Scoobs? A great dane?

26)   C.H.O.M.P.S. (1979) – I’m going out on a limb here and thinking that I might be the only person alive who has seen this film about a robotic mutt that has super strength and x-ray vision. The crime-fighting canine was created by Brian, who was played by my childhood crush Wesley Eure. Valerie Bertinelli played his main squeeze. I’ve actually been meaning to watch this again.

27)   “Battlestar Galactica” (1978-79) – I don’t know if Muffit was supposed to be a dog, but when I was a youngster, I thought it was the coolest damn thing on this planet. And I wanted one for myself. I recently had a nerdgasm when I visited the Science Fiction museum in Seattle, and saw the original costume for Boxey’s (Noah Hathaway) robotic, um, dog in person.

28)   “Lost Boys” (1987) – One of my favorite vampire films, starring the two Coreys – Haim and Feldman – and the very delicious looking Jason Patric. What made this film even cooler – and I know that would have been difficult – was Haim’s Siberian Husky named Nanook. He has a great moment while Haim is in the bathroom, washing his hair and singing, and Michael, a new vampire, enters. The dog leaps and attacks! You go, kick ass dog.

29)   “Eight Below” (2006) – I would be hard pressed to pick a favorite out of the seven or so lead “actors” in this Disney film, because all were stunning. A mixture of huskies and malamutes, these canines have to brave all kinds of dangers when a storm forces their humans to “abandon” them in Antarctica. I bawled until I couldn’t bawl anymore while watching this film. Based on a true story.

30)   “Hachi: A Dog’s Tale” (2009) – Based on the true story of an Akita that, even after his “owner” died, he continued going to the train station to greet him. Another tearjerker. In Japan, this dog is so revered; he has his own bronze statue at the Shibuya train station, in Tokyo.

31)   “Hart to Hart” (1979-84) – The very wealthy, overly affectionate amateur sleuths’ shaggy and scrappy dog named Freeway was a highlight of this TV series. In the 1970s, if you had a dog in your show, it had to look a bit like Benji.

32)   “Marley & Me” (2008) – Marley is a troublemaking Golden Labrador that causes all sorts of grief for his owner, John Grogan (Owen Wilson). The film is hilarious until the end. I have never cried so much during a film in my life.

33)   “Blindness” (2008) – This is such a gut-wrenching and emotionally draining film – a group of people who are afflicted by a strange “white blindness” epidemic are quarantined and then essentially left to fend for themselves, resulting in extortion, rape and murder – that by the end when that beautiful Airedale Terrier shows up and sits next to the long-suffering Julianne Moore, I burst into tears.

34)   “Alice in Wonderland” (2010) – Tim Burton and his penchant for dogs again. This one is Bayard, a CGI created bloodhound.

35)   “The Patriot” (2000) – I really didn’t like this film, but loved the inclusion of Gen. Lord Charles Cornwallis’s (Tom Wilkinson) beloved Great Danes, who are named Jupiter and Mars. The most memorable part of this historically inaccurate drivel.

36)   “The Wolfman” (2010) – In this homage to horror films, Sir John Talbot (Anthony Hopkins) has a massive dog named Samson. Very impressive specimen that could be a Mastiff mixed with a Great Dane.

37)   “True Blood” (2008-present) – Sam Merlotte (Sam Trammell) can shapeshift into various animals, but he usually becomes a dog, I think, a brown Border Collie. Made me like Sam the minute I knew his animal of choice.

38)   “Bolt” (2008) – The titular character of this animated film is a white German Shepherd (voiced by John Travolta) who is the star of a popular TV series. When this “superhero” takes a cross country journey with a know-it-all cat, he learns that his powers aren’t actually real.

39)   “The Cell” (2000) – Serial killer Carl Stargher (Vincent D’Onofrio) is one sick man – he enjoys hanging from hooks in his back and kidnapping and torturing women – and yet he has great taste in dogs. His is an absolutely stunning white/albino German Shepherd.

40)   “Silence of the Lambs” (1991)  – Jame “Buffalo Bill” Gumb (Ted Levine) has no problem with capturing “big fat girls,” putting them into a deep well, and then commanding them to rub lotion on their bodies. (He’s constructing a woman suit that he can wear.) But he does have a problem if you capture his adorable white canine, either a poodle or Bichon Frise, named Precious and you threaten to hurt her.

41)   “Bad Moon” (1986) – Another German Shepherd! This one is named Thor in the film; Primo in real life, and he’s the heroic protector of a family against a werewolf curse.

42)   “Up” – Thanks to modern technology, the “cone of shame” wearing Dug can talk; and talk he does. One of the greatest animated dogs ever.

43)    “The X-Files” (1993-2002) – In one of my favorite episodes titled “Clyde Bruckman’s Final Repose,” the titular character, played by Peter Boyle, had a fluffy Pomeranian named Queegqueg. When he died, Agent Scully inherited the canine. Unfortunately he/she didn’t last very long. It was eaten by a giant crocodile. So sad.

44)   “The Thing” (1982) – An alien lands in Antarctica and makes its way to an outpost by “becoming” a Siberian Husky/wolf hybrid. The poor thing doesn’t last very long, but boy is the animal cast in this role brilliant. I rewatched the film a while back and listened to the commentary, and even director John Carpenter couldn’t believe how well it acted.

45)   “The Corpse Bride” (2005) – Oh Tim Burton, you and your dog loving ways. In this “animated” film, a shy groom (Johnny Depp) finds himself hooked up with a Corpse Bride (Helena Bonham Carter). At some point in the film, he is reunited with his childhood dog, Scraps, who is now a skeleton. So adorable with or without fur.

46)   “Brain from the Planet Arous” (1957) – In this B-level, sci-fi movie, an alien brain comes to Earth and, as a lot of aliens do, has some diabolical plan – I don’t remember what it was. The only one who can foil it is the main character’s girlfriend’s dog named George. In fact, the dog becomes a vessel of sorts for a rival “good” alien. It’s a strange but surprisingly watchable film. And the dog was awesome!

47)   “Journey of Natty Gann” (1985) – Technically a wolf, but who cares. In this film, a Depression-era girl (Meredith Salenger) runs away from her guardian and hops a train from Chicago to Washington State to look for her father. Along the way, she befriends an abused wolf.

48)   “Sword of a Stranger” (2007) – A swordsman reluctantly agrees to take a boy and his faithful dog (probably a shiba inu) to a remote Buddhist temple. The dog is so amazingly cute and brave.

49)    “Princess Mononoke” (1997) – I know, again, this isn’t accurate. The “dogs” in this film are actually giant white wolves that are in fact kami, or gods, so sue me. I love, love, love them. And their human “child,” San, is my role model.

50)   “White Fang” (1991) – No list would be complete without this retelling of the classic Jack London novel. In this story, a young man (Ethan Hawke) befriends a wolf-dog hybrid.

Like most action films, “Salt” was originally written for a male actor. And, at one time, Tom Cruise was attached to or was talking about being attached to the role. Then he bailed, and it was rewritten for a female. If you stop right there, and think about how this could play out, your mind should return only a few results: CIA agent, Evelyn Salt, a gun wielding, take-no-prisoners badass who has a vulnerable side could be played, believably, by just a handful of actresses, including Milla Jovovich, Charlize Theron, Uma Thurman, Carla Gugino, and Angelina Jolie. I have nothing against these other actresses, but thanks be to the cinematic gods that Jolie stepped into the role, because she’s undeniably the best choice.

Early on in the film, we encounter Salt as a political prisoner. Held by the North Koreans, she is regularly taken out of her cell, interrogated, beaten and tortured. Her response never changes: “I am not a CIA agent.” But she is, and not much later she is seen, escorted by her superior, Ted Winter (Liev Schreiber), away from the prison. The reason for her release? Her husband, Mike Krause (August Diehl), an entomologist, has been making a lot of noise, and the government has responded. Flash forward, and we see Salt back in the U.S. It’s her wedding anniversary, and she’s getting ready to leave the office for her celebration. She waives her badge over the scanner and walks toward the exit, when she and Winter are called back. It seems a Russian defector, Orlov (Daniel Olbrychski), has some information he wants to share with the CIA, and Salt is the best the agency has for hearing it. If you’ve seen the trailer for “Salt,” you know that Orlov lets it slip that the CIA has a double agent in its midst, and her name is Evelyn Salt. Acting on fear, Salt escapes from the federal building and goes on the run. But what is her real reason for running? Whose side is she really on? We spend most of the film, trying to figure that out.

Although “Salt” isn’t particularly innovative – it’s sort of the Bourne trilogy meets “Enemy of the State” with some “Gorky Park” thrown in – it is still a highly enjoyable, fast-paced action-adventure. And although, this isn’t my favorite film genre – I tend to get bored during the last half of action films – I still found myself captivated until the end credits. Why? I really liked Evelyn Salt. And I liked her from the very beginning. Most people will find this dumb, but oh well. Here it goes … in most films, animals are “throw away” characters. In horror, they are usually the first sacrificial victims, something that has always made me angry about the genre. “The Hills Have Eyes” is a rare exception. Other genres aren’t any more forgiving. For instance, two years ago, in “The Incredible Hulk” Bruce Banner (Edward Norton) is hiding out in some South American country, living with just his dog. When some gun men show up, he bolts, leaving his companion behind to face the bullets that were intended for him. As an intense dog lover, these details color my cinematic experience and shape my attitude toward the character. From this one early scene, I was convinced that Banner was a total jerk and had a difficult time developing sympathy towards his character. And now this brings us back to the subject of Salt. After she’s “outed,” she tries reaching her husband on her cell phone. Time and again, she gets his answer machine. Worried, she returns home. As she’s looking around, her Cairn terrier appears in the living room. Immediately, I thought, “oh here we go again,” especially once the heavily armed forces show up in her hallway. Just in time, she slips out of her apartment and begins maneuvering around on the ledges. Once on a fire escape, she looks inside one of the apartments and sees a young girl doing her math homework. As Salt talks to her, she takes the pack off of her back, and unzips it. Out comes the small, brown dog. Giving the girl some money, she asks if the girl will take care of the animal until she can come back. Then Salt slips out again. This one detail about Salt’s character speaks volumes, and I was in her court from that moment on. Take that Bruce Banner.

SPOILERS AHEAD !!!! Some people have criticized “Salt” for being “unbelievable.” After all, the film wants us to believe that the Russians have long had a secret program in which they have been brainwashing and training children with the ultimate goal of replacing American citizens with these agents. Once the time is right, the Russians will “activate” them, thus creating havoc and bringing about World War III. Does it seem reasonable? Who cares. It isn’t any less believable than “The Manchurian Candidate” or “The Boys From Brazil.” Since when are action-adventures documentaries? The real yardstick for whether or not you want to watch them is do they contain a lot of action? In this case, it’s a resounding yes. The fact that Jolie did most of her own stunts still impresses the hell out of me. She has to leap from a bridge onto a semi-trailer and then onto a truck and then onto the street. She leaps down an elevator shaft, one side to the next. She is in car crashes. She knocks the crap out of anyone within reach and uses more artillery than an army unit in Iraq. Jolie is not just a female action hero; she is an action hero, period, and I would put money down on her against most guys. I also know that some people didn’t buy the emotional component of the story, but it really got to me. And it made her character seem more vulnerable and more human. I was rooting for her all the way.

Kudos to Kurt Wimmer for creating such an amazing character. I’ve been a fan of his since “Equilibrium” (2002), which is sort of “Fahrenheit 451” meets “The Matrix,” and with the exception of the slight hiccup that was “Ultraviolet,” he keeps delivering the goods, including “Street Kings” and “Law Abiding Citizen.” Director Phillip Noyce also does a nice job of keeping everything moving along at runaway train speed. This is his second time directing Jolie – they did “The Bone Collector” together in 1999 – and hopefully more projects are in their future.

Finally, the secondary players are noteworthy. Schreiber can be counted on for a delicious performance; and it’s always nice to see Chiwetel Ejiofor, playing Peabody, in a film. Although Diehl has a small role, he does a fine job of giving the film its emotional core. He’s an exceptional actor, and I’ve enjoyed seeing him in many films, including “The Ninth Day,” “The Counterfeiters,” and especially “Inglourious Basterds.” Let’s hope he keeps getting more and more work on this side of the Atlantic.

In a year filled with plenty of duds, “Salt” proved to be well worth the admission price and 100 minutes of my time. I enjoyed it so much, in fact, that I plan on seeing it again. Glad to see Jolie back where she belongs – being gorgeous while blowing things up.

I don’t know if it was jetlag or what, but when I bought my ticket to see “Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time” I actually believed that it had the potential to be good. Consider these points: It is directed by Mike Newell, the guy behind “Enchanted April” and “Into the West.” It stars Jake Gyllenhaal, who has proven himself in a string of films, including “Donnie Darko,” “Zodiac,” “Rendition” and “Brothers.” And … well, that’s it, apparently, because even those factors couldn’t make it watchable.

Based on a videogame franchise, “Prince of Persia” centers on Dastan (Gyllenhaal), an orphan whose righteous behavior encourages King Sharaman (Ronald Pickup) to adopt him and raise him alongside his other princely sons Tus (Richard Coyle) and Garsiv (Toby Kebbell). The “plot” of the film, as it were, involves a rival kingdom, accusations of arms dealing, a wrongful invasion, a murder, and, eventually, the discovery of a mystical dagger that, when a button is pushed on its top, can rewind time. There’s also a quasi-romantic element to the film involving Dastan and a snooty princess named Tamina (Gemma Arterton), and a lot of ridiculous, cliched talk about destiny.

Amazingly, it took three people to write the screenplay – Boaz Yakin, Doug Miro, and Carlo Bernard working from a screen story by Jordan Mechner – when all they really did was paste together scenes from “The Mummy,” “Tomb Raider,” Walt Disney’s “Aladdin,” “Raiders of the Lost Ark,” “Clash of the Titans,” and “Kingdom of Heaven.” Uninspired. Derivative. Time-gobbling. Horrendous …. All of these words come to mind when I recall the incredibly tedious 116 minutes that I wasted while watching this film.

Within the first 10 minutes, I was ready to walk out of “Prince of Persia.” Why? Look at the title. “Prince of PERSIA.” Doesn’t that mean that the casting director should have looked for actors who resembled, oh I don’t know, Persians? Instead, everyone speaks with a British dialect, because, of course, all of the main actors hail from England. Except, of course, the blue-eyed, American lead actor who is of Swedish/Jewish descent. I know this is nitpicking, but it still annoys the hell out of me. We aren’t in the early 20^th century anymore: When Italians played American Indians. Or when whites smeared on black face to be African-Americans or pulled their eyelids tightly to play Chinese. I can accept the idiotic casting decisions of yesteryear, when someone thought that John Wayne should play Genghis Khan – the abomination is called “The Conqueror” (1956) – or Katherine Hepburn could play Jade Tan, a Chinese woman in “Dragon Seed” (1944), but this is the 21^st century, people. We are a global community with ready access to actors from all over the world. Surely, we can cast a film appropriately. The minute I saw and heard the Brits being “Persian,” I couldn’t get over its Walt Disney-fication of world cultures and wanted to hurt someone.

That’s not the only reason to boycott this film. In one word – it’s atrocious. The motivation behind the murder of the king made me say, out loud, “that’s it? That is what this is all about?” The over-reliance on CGI is beyond ridiculous, making me wonder why they didn’t just make an animated, full length version of the story and save themselves some money. The sexual tension, if that’s what we’re calling it, between Arterton and Gyllenhaal is non-existent. And she’s essentially playing the same character she did in “Clash of the Titans.” When are her 15 minutes over? Ben Kingsley, who plays uncle Nizam, looks like Ming the Merciless. Alfred Molina’s character, Sheik Amar, goes on and on about taxes. I think it’s supposed to be funny; it isn’t. And so on.

“Prince of Persia” is hands down, one of the worst films out in this already abysmal year, and makes “Tomb Raider” look like a masterpiece. Making just $30 million back on its obscene $150 million budget, and I think we can call it like we see it – a box office bomb. And deservedly so.

Even before her nonprofit cinema ever opened its doors, Rachel Jacobson always knew that a LGBT film series would happen there. “It was something I always wanted to do,” said the founder/director of Film Streams. The challenge, though, was to find significant and groundbreaking films that explored the diversity of the LGBT experience that also fit into the cinema’s mission, which is “to enhance the cultural environment of the Omaha-Council Bluffs area through the presentation and discussion of film as an art form.” Jacobson brainstormed with a variety of her friends and her booking agent, trying to select films that were diverse in terms of theme, genre and nationality. The result is the Out in Film series, which will run June 3 to July 1 at the Ruth Sokolof Theater. “I’m pleased to say that we came up with a phenomenally long list that fit every category,” Jacobson said.

Because of budgetary concerns, the Out in Film series contains a smaller number of films than one has seen in other film series. That said, there are nine on the schedule, beginning with “Word is Out,” a “groundbreaking documentary” from 1977 that is being screened in a newly restored and re-mastered 35mm print. “It’s an important documentary that was only seen by a fringe audience,” Jacobson said. Robert Patterson, leadership team member of GOglbt, Greater Omaha GLBT Professionals, will lead a post-show panel discussion of the film, starting at 7 p.m. on June 3. “I first saw this film almost 20 years ago, so it will be interesting to see how much has changed (in the gay community) since then,” he said. “I have a feeling that there have been some dramatic changes, and sadly, in some instances, none at all.” One thing that has changed, he explained, is the visibility of GLBT characters on the big and small screen. “I remember that one of my college newspapers did an article about gay characters on TV, and that was a research project; I remember that ‘Quantum Leap’ had one. Now ‘Archie’ comics has a gay character.”

The remaining films in the series come from a veritable who’s who of the most influential international filmmakers of the last 30 years, Jacobson said, and include such names as Ang Lee, Wong Kar Wai, Gus Van Sant and Pedro Almodovar. On the schedule, in chronological order, are: Lee’s second feature “The Wedding Banquet” (1993); Van Sant’s debut film “Mala Noche” (1985); Lisa Cholodenko’s “High Art” (1998), the film that made Ally Sheedy relevant again; Wong’s “Happy Together” (1997), Almodovar’s “Law of Desire” (1987), Rob Epstein’s documentary “The Times of Harvey Milk” (1984), “Longtime Companion” (1989), one of the first features to address the AIDS crisis; and Kimberly Reed’s newly released documentary “Prodigal Sons” (2008).

If Out in Film goes over well, Jacobson said that she can definitely see doing this again. “We may do one every year or every other year,” she said. “I definitely don’t feel this is over. But it all depends on our level of support.” Patterson said that he would like nothing more than to see a regular series materialize: “I’m excited that Film Streams is the first theater to make this happen. Whenever I ask our (GOglbt) group members what they want to see happen in Omaha, there is always a response for a film series. I got to Sundance every year, and the GLBT presence is so high. It’s an inherent part of Hollywood. This series is long overdue.”

Tickets for all screenings are $9 for general admission, $7 for seniors, students and teachers, and $4 for Film Streams members. For screening times and specific dates, go to www.filmstreams.org. The Film Streams Ruth Sokolof Theater is at 1340 Mike Fahey St.

Stop anyone on the street and ask them about Robin Hood, and they will probably tell you that he was a Sherwood Forest-dwelling outlaw who, with his band of merry men, stole from the rich to give to the poor. Even if you went back in time, you might get the same response. After all, medieval chroniclers dating to the early 1400s believed he was real, even though modern researchers have yet to find any evidence of such an historical figure. Real or not, most of us know about Mr. Hood’s penchant for arrow shooting, his love for Maid Marian, and his hatred of King John. We also know that he hung out with the ridiculously named Little John and Friar Tuck.

Why do we know these things? Robin Hood and his adventures are popular fodder for TV series and films. According to imdb.com, there are 111 projects involving a Robin Hood character and one video game; there’s even a Japanese take on the legendary hero titled “Robin Hood no yume” from 1924. (Now that, I’d like to see.) His earliest film dates to 1912 and is a short titled, what else, “Robin Hood.” Throughout the decades, a variety of famous and not-so famous actors have tackled the role, each adding his spin. Douglas Fairbanks, who was in “Robin Hood” (1922); and Errol Flynn, star of “The Adventures of Robin Hood” (1938) are two of the best known, early thespians.

My first exposure to the legend came courtesy of Walt Disney’s 1973 animated classic, in which Robin was literally a “foxy lad,” voiced by Brian Bedford. Prince John (Peter Ustinov) was a thumbsucking, maneless lion who hung out with a petulant snake named Sir Hiss (Terry Thomas); and Little John (Phil Harris) was a big hearted bear. Always one for shaking things up a bit, Disney even added a cross-dressing sequence and cast a few voice actors who sounded like Arkansas hillbillies. Good times. Is it wrong to say this is my favorite take on Robin Hood?

My second most memorable experience with the outlaw was in “Monty Python and the Holy Grail” (1976). The character, played by Eric Idle, was also known as Sir Robin the Not-Quite-So-Brave-as-Sir Launcelot and was easily terrified. (He is said to have “bravely run away” from many conflicts.) The song performed by the Minstrel (Neil Innes) is a rather graphic depiction of all the horrible things our hero would prefer to have happen to someone else, such as being “mashed into a pulp” and “having his limbs all hacked and mangled.” Check it out on Youtube.

In 1976, Sean Connery starred opposite Audrey Hepburn in “Robin and Marian,” a film that focused on the characters in their later years. Robin has returned from the Crusades and seeks out Marian for one last woo. Anglophiles will probably go into spasms when they see the A-list talent filling out the supporting roles, such as Ian Holm, Denholm Elliott, Richard Harris, Robert Shaw, and Nicol Williamson. In 1981, Robin Hood had a minor role in Terry Gilliam’s “Time Bandits.” John Cleese looked a bit silly sporting his pageboy cut and extremely long peaked cap, but he was still fabulous.

We’ll skip over Kevin Costner’s abominable performance as the middle-aged, corn fed, Midwestern sounding Robin – the only reason to endure “Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves” (1991) is seeing Alan Rickman as the Sheriff of Nottingham – and instead direct your attention to Vincent Cassel’s singing ladies’ man Monsieur Hood in “Shrek” (2001). Why he was French, I’ll never know.

The two most recent projects include the BBC produced TV series “Robin Hood” (2006-09), which starred young Irish actor Jonas Armstrong in the lead role; and Ridley Scott’s revisionist “Robin Hood” (someone get creative with these titles already), starring Russell Crowe as Robin Longstride, Cate Blanchett as Marion Loxley, and Kevin Durand as Little John. With his action/drama, Scott attempts to focus on the man, an archer in the army of Richard Coeur de Lion, and how he came to be the legendary hero. Crowe, in his typical outspoken ways, has heavily criticized previous efforts, calling them “impractical and unrealistic.” The one he seemed to hate the most is Costner’s, which he described as “a Jon Bon Jovi video.” How Crowe’s own film fares remains to be seen, but at least Robin Hood is back to sounding English, uh, kind of.

The 1980s gave birth to several horror icons -  Jason Voorhes of “Friday the 13^th,” Michael Myers of “Halloween,” and Freddy Krueger of “A Nightmare on Elm Street.” The first two already got the Hollywood reboot, in 2009 and 2007, respectively; Freddy hit the big screen again on April 30, and with great success. The film took the No. 1 spot and claimed $32.2 million. (Rob Zombie’s “Halloween” made $30.6 million on opening weekend; “Friday the 13^th” made an astonishing $43.6 million.)

Written and directed by Wes Craven, “A Nightmare on Elm Street” (1984) centered on Nancy (Heather Langenkamp), her friend Tina (Amanda Wyss), Nancy’s boyfriend Glen (Johnny Depp in his cinematic debut), Tina’s boyfriend Rod (Nick Corri), and a disfigured, homicidal bogeyman (Robert Englund) who haunted the protagonists in their dreams. Dressed in a hat and a red-and-green striped sweater, and wearing a glove with blades for fingers, Fred Krueger was, in life, a notorious child-killer who, when the justice system failed, was hunted down and burned alive by the parents of Elm Street. This original film was blood drenched – when Depp dies, a geyser of blood shoots out of his bed and onto the ceiling – with plenty of “boo” moments. And yet, 26 years later, it doesn’t completely hold up. The synthesizer soundtrack, which was de rigueur back then, is beyond annoying, and Englund comes off as a bit too clownish. For instance, when he cuts off his fingers or cuts his side, exposing green slime, he laughs about it. (I found this pretty lame.) Also, because no time is spent in developing Krueger’s back story, he is more a devil than a real-life serial killer. (This is supported by the frequent shots of an ever-present crucifix.)

Undoubtedly, these and other reasons made this franchise ready for a makeover. With a screenplay by Eric Heisserer and Wesley Strick, the film, again focuses on a character named Nancy (Rooney Mara), her friend Kris (Katie Cassidy), Kris’s ex Jesse (Thomas Dekker), Kris’s current squeeze Dean (Kellan Lutz), Quentin (Kyle Gallner), the guy who digs Nancy; and, of course, Krueger (Jackie Earle Haley), who still haunts everyone in their dreams, still kills them in their dream state, and was still hunted down and burned by the pissed off parents. The big difference between the original and this version is that Krueger’s back story is greatly expanded; we learn WHY he is doing what he’s doing. Instead of being a notorious child killer, Krueger is a truly sick pedophile. What makes the character even more disturbing is that the sexual innuendo present in the original film, and carried into this remake, such as Krueger’s gloved hand that appears between Nancy’s spread legs in the bath tub, has a decidedly stomach churning context. It bothers me just thinking about it.

Purists of the original will be happy to note that the screenwriters have duplicated entire sequences from 1984 flick, such as the death scene in which one character is cut up while being thrown around a room. Non-purists and horror aficionados, in general, might appreciate the film’s overall darker tone, improved soundtrack by Steve Jablonsky, and greatly improved acting. You couldn’t find a worse performance than Ronee Blakley, who played Nancy’s mom, in the original. Dire! And, I know people won’t like this, but I think that Haley, who was mind-blowing as Rorschach in “Watchmen” and freaky as George Noyce in “Shutter Island,” one-ups Englund, by leaving the cheese in the refrigerator where it belongs.

On the surface, “Nightmare” seems to be just another dumb slasher flick. But look deeper and you will find a story about how psychological wounds create and sustain “monsters.” It’s no surprise that Craven has a degree in psychology. OK, so you aren’t a deep thinker. That’s fine. How about this: The opening dream sequence – featured in the trailer and reminiscent of “Legion” – should have you gripping your armrest; and several of the “kill” scenes will either have you covering your eyes or recoiling ever slightly. One thing can be said of “Nightmare,” it’s the rare remake that’s better than the original.

In this outing, the world knows the identity of the armored hero: slick, narcissistic billionaire Tony Stark (Robert Downey Jr.). He himself is under pressure from the government, the press and the public to share his technology with the military, but he is unwilling, fearing of what might happen should it fall into the wrong hands. In “Iron Man,” those “wrong hands” belonged to wealthy financier and Stark Industry corporate bigwig Obadiah Stane (Jeff Bridges); in the sequel they belong to the power-hungry, rival industrialist Justin Hammer (Sam Rockwell), who has no real ethics to speak of. Playing Iron Man’s primary foe is Ivan Vanko (Mickey Rourke), the son of a Soviet physicist who designs his own repulsor-based weapon that is capable of helping him to take revenge against the Stark family. Stark has his own team of friends and confidants that consists of trusty assistant Pepper Potts (Gwyneth Paltrow); his chauffer, trainer and bodyguard Hogan (Jon Favreau, who also directs); Lt. Col. James “Rhodey” Rhodes aka War Machine (Don Cheadle), and Natasha Romanoff aka Black Widow (Scarlett Johansson), an agent of S.H.I.E.L.D. (Strategic Homeland Intervention, Enforcements and Logistics Division) who operates as a notary public in Stark Industries’ legal department. In addition, look for an extended cameo by Samuel L. Jackson, playing the eyepatched Nick Fury, who is director of the mysterious S.H.I.E.L.D.

For all of you trivia buffs: Tony Stark and his alter ego Iron Man came to life in 1962. Created by Stan Lee, but named by his brother Larry Lieber, the character first appeared in issue No. 39 of “Tales of Suspense.” In this 13-page story, we learn that Stark is an attractive millionaire bachelor and “top scientist who designed weapons for the government to combat the ‘Red guerillas’ in South Vietnam,” so reports Andy Mangels in his book “Iron Man: Beneath the Armor.” Reflecting events of its time, the story details how, while in the Vietnamese jungle, Stark encountered a booby trap that sent shrapnel dangerously close to his heart. (In “Iron Man,” the film, he is in Afghanistan, showing off his newest weapon, the Jericho, when he endures the same accident). Communist warlord Wong-Chu comes upon the wounded Stark, and offers him a deal: if he will create a powerful new weapon for him, he will have his surgeon save Stark’s life. (In the film version, the same deal is offered, but this time it comes from Afghani warlord Raza, played by Faran Tahir.) Assisted by captured physicist Ho Yinsen, played in the film by Shaun Toub, Stark constructs an iron suit that contains a pacemaker-like device that keeps his heart beating.

According to “The Official Handbook of the Marvel Universe: Deluxe Edition No 1-7,” Tony Stark is a large man, standing at 73 inches tall and weighing 225 pounds. Downey Jr. is about 69 inches and might be 175 pounds dripping wet. Whereas Stark has black hair and blue eyes; Downey Jr. has dark brown hair and brown eyes. As far as facial hair is concerned – Stark is usually sporting a moustache; Downey Jr. looks dashing in a goatee. As for the armored suit itself, it is 78 inches tall, 34 inches wide, and weighs 240 pounds.

And finally, a few casting tidbits. According to imdb.com, Al Pacino was considered for the role of Justin Hammer; Emily Blunt was tipped to play Black Widow; and Terrence Howard, who played Rhodey in the first film, was replaced by Cheadle after Howard and Marvel Studios had a falling out. Apparently, Rockwell was originally considered for the role of Tony Stark.

“The Losers” isn’t completely unwatchable but it has a lot of problems, including pacing issues, too many shaky cam moments, an uninspired soundtrack, and an overabundance of “oh, this looks like an homage to” moments. For instance, there is a protracted fight sequence between Saldana and Morgan that seems to be “borrowed” from “Mr. & Mrs. Smith.” The entire sequence during which Evans runs away from and then confronts three security guards smacks of “The Matrix.” (Towards the end, one of the bad guys even drives a Ducati, the preferred bike of Trinity in “The Matrix: Reloaded.”) Even before the opening titles start, you’re probably thinking “isn’t this essentially an ‘A-Team’ rip-off”? A bespectacled Evans is the only bright spot in an otherwise mediocre effort. If he’s in a scene, your eyes are trained on him. Morgan’s involvement is usually enough for me to want to see a film, but this time around his character doesn’t give him much opportunity to display his typical “oomph” and charisma. A lot of people are complaining about Patric’s performance/character, but I found him hysterical, maybe because I know people like him. He’s essentially a dysfunctional, amoral, power crazed guy who is annoyed by everyone around him, because mentally, they can’t keep up. He’s a mixture of Stewie Griffin, Vizzini and Prince Humperdinck, both from “The Princess Bride.”

Because “The Losers” had pacing problems, I often found my mind indulging in tangential thinking. For instance, as I watched Evans, I kept trying to figure out what else I had seen him in. And when I realized it was garbage like “Fantastic Four” and “Push,” began to feel sorry for him. Let’s hope “The First Avenger: Captain America” offers him better material. As I watched Jaenada, I decided his “cool” factor was undermined by the fact that he looked like A.J. McLean, the “hardcore” Backstreet Boy. Looking at Morgan made me wish that his dead characters – John Winchester and Judah Botwin -would somehow be written back into two of my favorite shows – the CW’s “Supernatural” and Showtime’s “Weeds.” And since, I had only recently learned that Patric is the son of Jason Miller, the actor who played Father Karras in “The Exorcist,” I continued to scrutinize Patric’s face, trying to see any sort of resemblance. (They both have dark hair. That’s all I got.) There’s more, but … that’s enough for now.

To be fair, “The Losers” never tries to be anything it isn’t. It knows it’s a “we have guns, bombs and testosterone to spare” kind of film, and it gives its audience plenty of all three. I just wish it had done it in a more inventive and fast-paced manner.

Dave Lizewski (Aaron Johnson) is your average high school student: He reads comic books, hangs out with his friends (Evan Peters and Clark Duke), and pines for Katie Deauxma (Lyndsy Fonseca), the pretty girl who ignores him. Like many other teenagers, he is an idealist, believing that we can, and should, make a difference in the world. But instead of volunteering to rake his neighbor’s yard or work in a soup kitchen, he decides to don a teal-colored scuba suit and a matching mask, and become a superhero known as Kick-Ass. To “advertise” his services, he sets up a page on a social networking site. His first attempt at being a masked crime fighter doesn’t go very well, but he doesn’t let a knife wound and broken bones dissuade him. Once he’s fighting fit, he’s out there, two batons in tow, taking on the bad guys. This time, his efforts wind up on YouTube, and he becomes a “star.” Little does he know that he is not alone in his attempts to clean up New York City.  A father and daughter team known as Big Daddy (Nicolas Cage) and Hit-Girl (Chloe Moretz) have been striking out at big time drug kingpin Frank D’Amico (Mark Strong), and he isn’t happy about it. Trouble for Kick-Ass is, he looks like the only troublemaker in town, and D’Amico has his sights on him.

“Kick-Ass” is based on Mark Millar’s comic book of the same name, and was a labor of love for writer-director Matthew Vaughn, who took the idea to various studios, and when they all passed, funded it himself. (Why they passed has something to do with the fact that the teenaged superheroes drop f-bombs and engage in gratuitous violence.) Those who are familiar with the comic book – the so-called “fanboys” – have been all a-dither with anticipation for “Kick-Ass,” and with good reason. The script is funny, very violent and ultimately subversive. It’s “Breakfast Club” meets “Spider-Man” but distilled through a Japanese manga-esque sensibility. Or it’s “Spy Kids” but helmed by Quentin Tarantino. It might have been a pain for Vaughn to act as producer and director and screenwriter, but his film is all the more better without studio intervention. I doubt that they would have let him cast a British unknown in the lead, but I can’t think of a better actor for this role than Johnson. Sporting a messy, curly hairdo and over-sized glasses that went out in the 80s, he is surprisingly down-to-earth and convincingly awkward; an attractive Napoleon Dynamite, perhaps. A studio also would have probably passed on the edgy Moretz, too, preferring a cuter, cuddlier Disney princess type for the role of Hit-Girl. And they would have down played her penchant for butterfly knives, heavy artillery and the f-word. Had a studio been involved, this film would have been a watered down, family friendly shadow of itself. Thank the stars that Vaughn didn’t let that happen. It is R-rated and it deserves to be. I didn’t count the number of kills in the film, but there are plenty of them. Most come courtesy of Hit-Girl, who has speed, agility and a real gusto for axing goons; and some are even pretty inventive; never seen a guy explode in a human-sized microwave before. (If you managed to get through “Repo Men” without flinching, you won’t even bat an eye at “Kick-Ass.”) I am completely unfazed by language anymore – having become desensitized by “Deadwood” and British gangster films – but, I guess a few words could affect those with tender ears. “Kick-Ass” isn’t my favorite film this year, but I’m sure once 2010 is done and dusted, it will be in the Top 10. After all, for the first time in a very long time, it made me appreciate Cage as an actor. I never once rolled my eyes at him. That says something. And it will surely makes stars of Johnson and Moretz, who steals the show from everyone.

After more than a decade of marriage, Phil (Steve Carell) and Claire (Tina Fey) Foster have found themselves in a rut. They come home from their equally mundane jobs – he prepares taxes; she sells houses – exhausted, and yet still have to find the energy to take care of their daughters. Even their once-a-week date night has stopped being an escape, because instead of trying something new, they always gravitate to the same restaurant and order the same food. Both realize that things have to change after they learn that their friends, the Sullivans (Mark Ruffalo and Kristen Wiig) are getting a divorce. Instead of visiting their local haunt, Phil suggests that they get dressed up and drive into the city, where they can eat at a fancy new restaurant. Without reservations, there is, of course, no way that the two will get a seat. While waiting at the bar, his wife complaining of hunger, Phil decides to seize an opportunity. With no one else responding to the call for “Tripplehorn, table for two,” he announces “that’s us. We’re the Tripplehorns.” They are shown to their chairs, and everything starts off well. They spot Will i Am of the Black Eyed Peas at a nearby table, they dine on expensive wine, and eat fine cuisine. And then two gun-toting men show up, asking them to step outside, and soon a case of mistaken identity takes a dangerous and life-threatening turn.

From the synopsis, you might think that this film, “Date Night,” is some kind of dark and violent thriller. Well, it isn’t. The studio is billing it as a comedy, and yet it isn’t really that either. “Date Night” reminded me a bit of “The Break-Up,” the 2006 Vince Vaughn/Jennifer Aniston film that wasn’t as much a comedy as it was an emotional sucker punch to your gut with some humor thrown in so you didn’t go home and jump off of a bridge. OK, so “Date Night” isn’t that emotionally wrenching, but it is “heavier” than anything that stars Will Ferrell, Adam Sandler or Ben Stiller. (I’m sure that comes as a surprise. Not.) Josh Klausner’s screenplay is, in a word, a mess, because it tries blending too many genres. One minute, you’re watching a serious conversation about how an emotionally overwhelmed Claire would like to reenact Charlotte Perkins Gilman’s “Yellow Wallpaper,” and in the next, the couple is zooming down a one-way street in a stolen Audi that has its grill fused with that of a taxi cab; everyone is screaming. Just in case that doesn’t illustrate my point: Other random and incongruent scenes, include a strange yet humorous argument between a tattooed character named Taste (James France) and his stripper girlfriend Whippit (Mila Kunis), late-night visits to the home of the always bare-chested Holbrooke (Mark Wahlberg), and then a truly bizarre pole dance performed by Fey, dressed in a red wig and saloon girl bustier, and Carell, in a track suit, in front of an increasingly aroused William Fichtner. I could go on, but I’ll spare you the imagery.

It probably sounds as if I hated “Date Night.” I didn’t. In spite of its many flaws, it still has the very likeable, very down-to-earth Fey and Carell at its center, and they are doing the best they can with material that would have been unwatchable in anyone else’s hands. There are even a few little moments in this film that will make you think that you love it. For instance, while they are out dining, Fey and Carell provide hilarious backstories on those sitting around them. If Fey and Carell can exhibit such wonderful chemistry in this kind of a stinker, just think what they could do in a well-scripted film? Here’s to hoping that this leads to something better. Like someone recognizing that they could be the next Hawn and Chase; Hepburn and Grant; or Gable and Lombard.